• letsgo@lemm.ee
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    20 days ago

    A friend persuaded me to go on a date with a girl I wasn’t particularly into. We went for a meal, then she wanted to go clubbing. But I’m not into that either, so she broke down in tears. I was pretty sure I hadn’t said anything that bad, but then the story came out: her ex-partner had the same first name and job as me, and the meal and clubbing were his favourite things, but he’d been found dead in another country with his common law wife and kids, and the similarity to me was effectively his coming back from the dead to be with her again.

    No there wasn’t a second date. I haven’t seen her since either. Neither have I taken dating advice off that friend since, although we are still friends.

    • weeeeum@lemmy.world
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      20 days ago

      I don’t think there’s any circumstance where “replacing” a dead loved one with someone similar would ever end well. Way too many expectations, and context the date would be unaware of.

  • sleepmode@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    I said I had never eaten vegan food. She asked if I’d like to try it at her favorite restaurant. She then made a huge deal about me being “only” vegetarian as we ate. Stunned as she went on and on about what a terrible, ignorant person I was, I noticed there was something odd about her front teeth, like they were stained. I didn’t think much of it and tried not to stare. She also kept insisting repeatedly that it wasn’t a date. Ok, that’s fine, I said which only seemed to make her angrier.

    We get in the car, and I’m relieved it’s almost over. She looks in the rear view, and starts freaking out that I hadn’t told her she had lipstick on her teeth the entire time. I tried to explain I didn’t know what it was and didn’t want her to be self-conscious. Awkward silence as she drove me home. Next day I noticed she had blocked me on everything. Good riddance I guess.

      • sleepmode@lemmy.world
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        20 days ago

        I mean, vegan substitutions for things like chicken I suppose. And yeah, I was completely bewildered the entire time. Even before this she was always semi-hostile in conversations but she always hit me up. It was bizarre.

      • sleepmode@lemmy.world
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        19 days ago

        I should’ve had my friend pick me up but this was the time before cell phones were ubiquitous. She had sort of cooled off near the end and had given me a mix tape. Thought maybe it was just bad timing. Wasn’t expecting her to go ballistic. Food was good though.

  • macrocarpa@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    Asked a girl out on a date. She invited me over to watch a movie with her at her parents house (we were in our late teens). I arrived; her recently deceased family dog and incredibly distressed mother were both in the kitchen. Dog was a really big golden retriever that had been euthanized, and the mom had bought him home? Not sure why? Maybe to hurt in the back yard or something? Idk

    Anyway I offered to leave but she was insistent that we watch the movie together, which we did, on the couch, with her mom crying in the next room. Halfway through the movie the mom screams he’s still alive, he’s still alive. Go into the kitchen, she’d gone to move the body and it had expelled air and made some noise. I had to explain, with my best year 12 biology, what had happened. Five minutes of this woman losing her shit with grief out of her beloved companion dying.

    Girl insisted we watch the last 10 minutes of the movie, it finishes with us watching in silence, I get up to leave and said something stupid like hey I’d love to do this again sometime and she says “I have a boyfriend”

    I’m like alright well that’s that then and didn’t put in any more effort. Stupid me, she was hot and I really liked her. Being a dipshit I wrote a song about it, using the thee guitar chords I knew, which takes me to act ii…

    …five years later, I’m at a party, exchanging worst first date stories with friends including a cute blonde. I wait my turn, tell the story, she laughs her arse off and then goads me into singing the song, accompanying myself poorly on the guitar. I absolutely fucking nail it, everyone is in stitches, sit down next to her and the night goes from there. We end up leaving r party for a walk down to the local beach, made out on the beach, things get frisky, jump in a cab back to my house, in bed together, have drunken sex…which results in a broken condom. She lives literally the other side of town so we have to wait till (a) I’m sober enough to drive and (b) pharmacy is open to get a plan b, then have the most awkward drive back to her house. Get there, offer to walk her to the door, she says no, kisses me goodbye in the car, then texts me…to say she has a boyfriend.

    • TimewornTraveler@lemm.ee
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      19 days ago

      Jesus that story had dips and turns. Man, the teenager saying “I have a boyfriend” must have been so frustrating… obviously really fucked up family dynamics there

      • macrocarpa@lemmy.world
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        19 days ago

        I was young and naive, even a couple years later I would’ve done a bit of digging. You know, questions like what’s his name, how long you guys been going out for, shouldn’t he be here with you in your moment of need given your fucking dog is dead.

  • Alpha71@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    I worked a security gig where I had to call into a phone call center every hour to show I was awake. I was there for three day and got to know the girl on the other end pretty well. We ended up almost talking the entire last night.

    We made arrangements to meet after we both got off work. I was incredibly nervous and my face had gotten itchy and i scratched it so badly my face swelled up. I had no way to get ahold of her to postpone our meet up. So we met and she freaked out at the sight of me and left. Never saw her again after that.

  • A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world
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    19 days ago

    five minutes after meeting her, she went into a graphically detailed spiel about how her father sexually abused her as a child. and she was very upbeat, happy, and smiling as if it was a delightfully fond memory the entire time.

    I dont know what the end of the story is because by the time she got about, what i hope, was a quarter of the tway through, I had already been so completely creeped and skeezed out that I had developed a cold sweat, and I just got up from the table, said nope, and walked away.

    I was kinda fucked up for a short while afterwards.

    • lagomorphlecture@lemm.ee
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      19 days ago

      It’s good to be open with a prospective partner but my God at least wait till the appetizer gets to the table.

      • A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world
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        19 days ago

        bro, it was not the openness, it was the gleeful aplomb.

        Like, imagine a 7 year old telling a story about their first trip across country to a major theme park, where they got to spend a day with their favorite princess, and how, even 40 years later, thats a story they tell with great joy, and a big smile?

        Only replace the trip and princess with what she said her dad did.

        It was fucking unsettlingly creepy.

  • imapuppetlookaway@lemmy.world
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    19 days ago

    The only time i tried online dating apps to the point of actually talking to another human i met a young woman and we exchanged a few messages then arranged a phone call. On the phone she wouldn’t stop talking. It was pretty amazing, this flood of words pouring from her. I supposed it was because she was nervous, but still - being pretty pessimistic about the whole online dating thing to begin with - figured this would never work out because her non-stop talking was starting to weird me out a little. Not in a terrible way, just a little.

    Anyway, she was going on and on about her job but was carefully avoiding any details that might identify where she worked, i guess so as to stay safe by not revealing too many personal details to a stranger. Somehow, though, I figured it out. She told me what area of the city she lived in, and i got enough details about the kind of work she did that i said something like: “Oh, you work at the Goodwill on blahblah street” and then there was dead silence. The flood of words stopped. We hung up soon after that. I felt really cool about guessing her workplace, like a detective, thinking i’d impressed her with my mind, but it wasn’t until years later that it dawned on me that i’d weirded her out even more than she weirded me out. A double oblivious weird out.

  • NoNotLikeThat@lemm.ee
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    20 days ago

    Definitely not as bad as some of the others mentioned here, but when I was 18 a slightly older coworker who had a crush on me for a while asked me out. I said yes because I didn’t really know how to say no at the time. I wasn’t physically attracted to him, but he was a really nice guy and I didn’t see the harm in giving him a chance.

    We’d already worked together for about a year then, so he knew a few things about my interests. He wanted to plan the whole thing and surprise me with where we’d go. We agreed for him to pick me up from my house at noon. I thought, “great, lunch date”; they’re pretty chill/non-intimate.

    So the day comes, he picks me up and we start driving. He tells me he’s taking me to the natural history museum. In DC. Over an hour away. Far for a first date, but I love that museum so I go along with it.

    We get there, wander around, chat, and after a couple hours walk out onto the national mall to some random food truck, grabbing a nearby bench to people watch while we ate. I wasn’t feeling a connection, however, was patient and respectful, after all, we had a good enough time so far, and he put effort into planning this.

    Now, normally, after the meal/activity is complete this is when a day date starts to come to a natural end. At this point it’s past 4pm, so I suggest we head to the car, thinking to myself that it’s a long drive back. Surprise! He tells me he got us two tickets for DC United that evening. Not a huge sports watching fan, I didn’t know how to react. Being young, inexperienced, and afraid to upset him I feigned excitement.

    He drove us to the stadium, parked, then got out to get something from his trunk. Another surprise! A cooler of Smirnoff ice. After the weirdest tailgate we go into the stadium, watch the game, get hotdogs, and the whole time I’m dreading what other surprises he has in store. He seemed so normal before.

    Luckily, after the game he finally took me home. I don’t remember what time it was, probably around 9pm, I just remember feeling relief at the sight of my front door. He tried to kiss me when dropping me off, but I managed to avoid any physical interaction. Looking back, it was the weirdest, cringiest date, and the main reason I always drove myself to dates from then on.

  • danafest@lemm.ee
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    20 days ago

    I took my current gf and my parents to a nice restaurant last night. She mentioned she’d only been there once before, on a date, and that the only reason they went to that restaurant (very $$$) is because he had a gift card and was going to cover the meal. Orders all kinds of expensive stuff. The bill comes and then supposedly he realizes his gift card, if it actually existed in the first place, was for a different restaurant. She ended up having to pay on her CC because he had no other forms of payment. Obviously didn’t work out for him in the end.

      • danafest@lemm.ee
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        20 days ago

        No, sorry if that wasn’t clear. She was telling the story to me and my parents, “he” was the man she’d been on a date with at the same restaurant previously.

  • BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world
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    21 days ago

    He kept talking on the phone before the date about how short he was. I assured him it was ok. He really was very short in person but I’m not bothered by that kind of thing, but the way he kept talking about how he was shorter than me (and I’m short) through the whole date just made it so pointless and self centered. When he asked me out again I said I had met someone else and it was getting serious just to avoid going through that again. He didn’t attempt to get to know me at all, so what was the point?

  • Smoogs@lemmy.world
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    21 days ago

    Worst date ever: Dude was drunk when I arrived on time. Apparently he arrived at the pub 3 hours earlier to just sit and drink. Claimed to be people watching the whole time.

    He was argumentative, obnoxious and creepy. Even bragged about people he was making uncomfortable in the bar.

    He said he Didn’t have a license to drive… likely because he lost it from drunk driving.

    Anyways I made up an excuse that I had to work early (he insisted to stay and keep drinking) and I left and blocked his contact as soon as I exited the pub.

    On another date the guy I think was homeless and couldn’t afford to go on a date which is not the bad part. We went around town and just went up elevators to look over the city scape. If anything that was a positive for him in that he was being innovative with his situation. The bad part was he was deep into the Rooshv bullshit. he started talking about how clever he was, making sexist comments about men and women and how they should be and making lewd comments about my body.

    As soon as we got to street level from the second building I said I had to go and tried to leave, he clamped a hand around my wrist to stop me but I used a bit of a self defence move to break free and wander into traffic to lose him.

  • bamfic@lemmy.world
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    21 days ago

    She kept going to the bathroom to smoke crack. Then disappeared for good before the check came.

  • ikidd@lemmy.world
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    21 days ago

    First date with a girl: I open the car door for her when I pick her up. As she gets in, she hooks a hoop earing on the corner of the door and rips it out of her ear. The next 6 hours are getting her through ER to get stitched up.

    Funny enough, I did get a second date and we hung out for about a year after that.

  • grrgyle@slrpnk.net
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    21 days ago

    We were teenagers and I went to her house in the boonies to shoot crossbows and play NBA Jam. Sounds ideal, right? So after shooting trees for a while she asks if I want to shoot her hamster.

    Maybe she was trying to be edgy or funny but I was so disturbed I made an excuse and started walking home (which was hours away). I finally managed to hitch a ride with this creepy couple into town (but that’s a whole other story - definitely did not give those two my home address).

    • mysticpickle@lemmy.ca
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      20 days ago

      she asks if I want to shoot her hamster.

      Pretty sure that’s code for 👉👌. SMH bro, you missed a wild lay man :>

  • M137@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    I’m a leftist dude living in one of the most leftist cities in a generally leftist and progressive country (although partly less so at the moment…) so generally have no issues with different political views and morals, most people are nice.

    I matched with a girl on a dating app only for vegans because I was tired of having to ask about it, deal with having an omnivore partner and of having idiots match with me only to be assholes towards me from mentioning it in my bio.
    We texted for about a week and got along super well, she was very into me and was the first to ask for a date so we set one up.
    The date started great too, we really clicked and I thought she was one of the most beautiful humans I’d ever seen. Then as we’re about to finish our food and pay the bill she tells me that I need to pay for it, I ask why (I happily would have, but was just interested in the reason) and she tells me that since I’m male I need to “atone” for all the bad shit men has done to women throughout human history… I thought she was joking but she really wasn’t. I was so floored that I didn’t know what to say so I just said nothing, I paid for my food and just left.
    I wrote with her a few times after that out of morbid curiosity and asked more about her political views etc. and it wasn’t good. She was not a feminist in my view, she was a man-hater and a militant extreme leftist with many morally fucked up views.

    I’m just glad I found this out on the first date and dodged a bullet.