Every time I’ve tried to use a bidet, I’ve hated it. The water feels uncomfortable and sudden, and then I feel like I either can’t get dry with toilet paper and get chapped later, or it breaks up from the water and leaves pieces everywhere. The air dry varieties seem to contribute to chapped butt too. I know some people use wash cloths, but frankly the idea of leaving butthole cloth out in the bathroom weirds me out also.
What is the secret to enjoying these things? Am I just too damn American for them?
Saving TP is a minor benefit. More important is never getting monkey butt, never embarrassed because your significant-other/FWB/date sees skid marks in your underwear, and no irritation from excessive wiping if you have sticky poop.
The key is to use a hose and not a fixed one. The fixed ones don’t really allow you to clean where you’d like whereas the hose ones let you aim wherever. At least that’s how it’s been in my experience.
I’ll never ‘go’ without one!
Seriously though, bidets rock. Try one, get a good one, and you’ll never go back.
Every time I’ve tried to use a bidet, I’ve hated it. The water feels uncomfortable and sudden, and then I feel like I either can’t get dry with toilet paper and get chapped later, or it breaks up from the water and leaves pieces everywhere. The air dry varieties seem to contribute to chapped butt too. I know some people use wash cloths, but frankly the idea of leaving butthole cloth out in the bathroom weirds me out also.
What is the secret to enjoying these things? Am I just too damn American for them?
When I use a bidet at home, I always do a few wipes first to avoid the breakup. Then I pat down with tp after to dry.
I get that some people want to save tp, but I just want to feel clean after I drop a bomb.
Saving TP is a minor benefit. More important is never getting monkey butt, never embarrassed because your significant-other/FWB/date sees skid marks in your underwear, and no irritation from excessive wiping if you have sticky poop.
That’s still saving a significant amount of TP even with the double wipe. Before I got a bidet I was wiping upwards of 5-10 times after some shits.
The key is to use a hose and not a fixed one. The fixed ones don’t really allow you to clean where you’d like whereas the hose ones let you aim wherever. At least that’s how it’s been in my experience.
You have to do the bidet dance with a fixed one, works just as well.
But then what is the drying strategy? That is my biggest problem.
Dab, don’t wipe
Smoked a dab, butt still wet, instructions unclear.
Uhm, clean up your butthole using water and some butthole-compatible soap, rinse and then dry with a towel.