Well I’m not going to look when I’m soft!

7 rules for dating my maga courtroom.

(I don’t think this show would have been as good…)

My grandma was born in 1920. She died last year at 103.

I know she couldn’t live forever, but she was the best person ever. Is it so wrong to want her to live to be 200 years old?

Uhhhhhh…nonexistant. Fuck you peasant!

I mean, I kid, but that’s essentially big tech’s stance on the issue.

I WANNA QUIT THE GYM!!!

Hey, we can quit the bank! Cut them off at the source!

I WANNA QUIT THE BANK!!!

(The fact that Friends made an episode about this 30 years ago shows how long it’s been a problem…)

What a long winding road we travel, to make absolutely no progress on our journey.

Eh…needs more boobies and niche content. 1 post per month on some communities isn’t enough.

Why is it every new thing that joins the fediverse, I have no use for?

It sounds cool…but I have no use for a 3D printer.

Why couldn’t a new service that’s all about sharing boobies join the fediverse? That would attract some users.

And he’s the only one.

Stop being right!

I’m getting txts to stop trump. I’m getting txts to support trump. I’m getting txts from black lives matter. I’m getting txts from some jewish advocacy group. I’m getting txts to support ohio’s voting volunteers. I’m getting txts to support a ban on porn in kentucky. I’m getting txts to support breast cancer awareness.

I’ve never donated money to anyone. I block every one of them.

You know what HASN’T been affected by shrinkflation? That wall of text explaining the concept of things we already know.

I’d like to make a sarcastic joke about what the rest of that bullshit was, but I couldn’t be bothered to read 8 full scrolls of nonsense before I got to “the worst offenders”. Literally the whole point of the article, and I have to scroll past an essay, and a nag about my adblock. You make me click “I’ll disable it next time”. YOU make me lie. I would happily click a text that said “I’ll never disable my ad blocker. Go choke on a buffet of dicks until you die, you absolute leech on society!”

Sadly, that wasn’t an option. It’s truthful though.

Will you stop?

I don’t get why this is NSFW?

I WAS interested (for the whole 20 seconds I knew of this product) then I saw your post, and nooooooope. Not paying that shit for a god damned novelty bag.

Maybe $40.

Vacations, you gotta treat like MySpace. Set your top 8, and make sure you choose your top 8 wisely.

8 photos I feel like can easily net you a good 25 minute conversation.

Babies/pets? Show me 1-2 photos. Don’t overdo it. You’re going to have more photos as time goes on. This isn’t a vacation where you have a finite amount of content. You’ll show me a photo of your baby being cute. Hey, that’s great. We’ll talk about it for a few minutes. But we’ll also talk about it for a few minutes next week when your baby is going to be cute again. So it’s not like I want to spend all day talking about your baby. Your baby is cute, I’m happy for you, but lets move on.

I feel like being a adult is just lying about how much you have your shit together to people who also lie about having their shit together.

I mean…yeah actually. Nailed it.

Except I TOTALY have MY shit together. I don’t frequently cry about about how cruel the world is, and how I’m going to die alone, likely by my own hand.

That TOTALLY isn’t a nightly occurance since I stopped drinking, because I gave myself cancer with alcoholism, but also can’t smoke weed because of workplace testing…

Nope. Just being a responsible adult, and paying bills for MEEEE!!!

Stop.

I think they stayed in, and voted. These are mail-in ballots, right?

Have you SEEN what our politicians are trying to push on us???

We say no.