Word. I teared up out of happiness after a dental hygienist (who I currently see) offered me numbing gel for my gums during a cleaning (even let me choose the flavor) in a totally non-judgmental way. I was in my late thirties and I didn’t know any dentists would be willing to offer that sort of stuff to adults.

😂

Reminds me of the show Baskets

Someday the person may have the ‘aha… fuck’ moment and think back to you. I’m so sorry you’re having to deal with it. I’m ADHD only diagnosed about 5 years ago but my work’s CEO is basically 15 years older, SUPER undiagnosed, and has money/power/sycophants so he will never truly ‘deal’ with any of it, even as he may be actively ruining his company and his behavior is causing the best people to quit. The defense mechanisms go deep. We can’t force introspection unfortunately…

I wonder if maybe women would have more time and energy to do the actual pursuing then, instead of being sidelined, oppressed, saddled with the labor of care work which is necessary for the continuation of the human race. Are you saying birthing men wouldn’t take on that care work?

God death penalty is already bleak but this is so strange to me — I have hard-to-find veins, so nearly every blood draw of my life has excruciating. (Good phlebotomists with butterfly needles are so rare and special!) But I never thought about that happening when you are also bracing for death… and then it being halted, to be continued… months/years later?! Like what

Wholeheartedly agree

I was not a homeowner at the time (still not) but anyway I have so much respect for you for quitting. Thank you

Noted - good point! I guess I meant ‘further left’ than whatever “far left “ boogeyman the original commenter had in their head.

I might be wrong but I don’t think this actually pleases “far left” — far left prefers maximums / taxing billionaires rather than just raising the minimum without any regulations to keep costs from rising indefinitely

The first therapist I saw happened to be really good, or maybe I was really ready to hear her, possibly both. One thing she mentioned and really affected me at the time: observing how I expressed how guilty I felt about how mad I was about XYZ, that often the “secondary” feelings (guilt) give us more trouble than the primary feeling (anger). This helped me start to drill down into what my actual feeling/reaction to XYZ was, and I could feel less plagued/affected by the guilt/shame/whatev that had been drilled into my head over time (by mom, teachers, whomever).

I went to one therapist in my late 20s for about 6 months, then in mid/late 30s spoke with 2 different psychiatrists and 2 different talk therapists / social workers, plus have experienced 3 different couples counselors (oh joy). Some are not a good fit. I recommend trying someone for a few sessions — at least 3 — and then allowing yourself to try a different person. They will not be offended!

As a lurker who also has ADHD your non-answer here gave me a laugh 😆

Is it part of either/both business’ strategy to open a new location in the same town/strip as the rival location? The Applebees-vs-Chilis experience rings true for me as well. Give the American populace a way to differentiate themselves with extremely similar options lol

I agree with you about the logistics difficulty. But there are many in power who are pretty clearly working toward implementing those steps lined up above, even as they’re incredibly inefficient and buffoonish. Many people, both “docile” and whatever may be perceived as “out-of-line”-ers, have been punished already, for years, and there’s no sign of stopping from those in power.

To the authoritarian buffoons, the end game is: riches for me, enslavement/extermination for thee, all to run from their weird daddy issues.

For sure. Living just to spite the hateful fuckers over here.

I’m into it honestly 🥲

The tube works pretty well though

me toooo hi 👋

Also this is mostly all to say, I don’t understand genres past say release year 2005 😅

Sorry I typed Limp Bizmit but meant Bizkit…

It’s not very intuitive, for sure. It really is about if you were there at the time and probably place (up until, say, 2005) hearing XYZ song/style becoming popular on the radio and mass media. Only then do you pick up the lingo and see how other people referred to it.

Plus, go browse the racks at a music store in another country (preferably where the main language is different from your own). I remember seeing a Tower Records in a major Japanese city have a whole area designated as “Black Music” (not like a seasonal feature/display, but a section/‘genre’) and being baffled, like all soul blues funk R&B early rap gangsta rap and dance pop was all one section (filtered only by skin color)? But then again, is all J-pop or K-pop always the same style, or do English-language listeners lump a lot of things together by overarching basic criteria? (Like just shuffling music off based on country/language of origin etc)

Alternative rock was different to the popular rock from on mainstream stations in the 70s/80s and early 90s. See also “college rock.” But then alternative rock becomes mainstream and fractures into subgenres (for example, compare Limp Bizmit once called “nü rock” and White Stripes “garage rock” — fairly different styles), less mainstream artists continue plugging away in their various “indie” lanes, plus what does “college rock” (like REM of the 80s) mean in the 2010s/2020s anyway? Short answer: big fat nothing; long answer is, first you start doing deep dives in music journalism of yore, browsing the categories/sections at record stores, talk to old music heads and hear their opinions (mostly opinions, right, less ‘facts’), and then you have a better lay of the many various musical landscapes and keep exploring.