• Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    0
    ·
    edit-2
    3 个月前

    Mine are all pretty mild.

    Everyone reading all the time at home. Pretty much every room had bookcases, full to bursting with books. When I was old enough to have friends around they all said how weird it was to have so many books.

    My parents were really emotionally distant. I don’t recall either of them telling them they loved me - or each other for that matter. No hugs or kisses. More than one of my girlfriends called me an emotional cripple.

    Home-cooked food every night. We never ate out, never had takeaway. My mum was a great cook though so although my friends seemed to think it was weird I’d never had a MacDonalds when I finally did try it I didn’t understand the hype.

    Oh, and the poop knife, of course.

  • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    0
    ·
    3 个月前

    Knee pain. Everyone told me it was normal growing pains, until one little league coach notice I run weird. Queue years of doctors and specialists and tests and scans and surgeries, and now I’m a 40 something guy with advanced arthritis that could have been much much worse if left untreated.

      • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        2 个月前

        My parents took me to see doctors, who told them it was just growing pains and suggested I exercise more to lose weight. I saw three specialists and had a bunch of xrays before anyone noticed the shady spots on my cartilage. Osteochondritis Dissecans occurs in 15-30 people out of 100,000, and most of the primary care doctors I’ve had in my life had never heard of it.

        I can’t blame my parents for that. I can blame them for a lot of things, but they did their best.

  • dingus@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    0
    ·
    3 个月前

    I remember one day realizing it was odd that my dad would hug my mom but my mom would never hug him back. She would just stand there and let him hug her. Yeah he was an abusive husband and I was very happy for her when she finally left him after over a decade!

  • inlandempire@jlai.lu
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    0
    ·
    edit-2
    3 个月前

    Social democracy

    In general the political system you grow up in seems to becomes a normalcy in your mind when in reality there’s so many different ways of governing

    • cally [he/they]@pawb.social
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      0
      ·
      3 个月前

      Also, apparently some people can’t consciously control the focus distance of their eyes.

      TIL that some people can’t do that. huh

    • Dasus@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      0
      ·
      3 个月前

      Also, apparently some people can’t consciously control the focus distance of their eyes.

      This was a surprise for me as well as a child. I thought my eyes would change in how they look when I made them blurry, but yeah, you can’t see that.

    • HobbitFoot @thelemmy.club
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      0
      ·
      3 个月前

      Also, apparently some people can’t consciously control the focus distance of their eyes.

      It’s a sailboat!

    • moonlight@fedia.io
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      0
      ·
      3 个月前

      That’s interesting, for most people the brain just substitutes in the image of where your eye moves to, so it feels instantaneous. (there’s no noticeable blindness) But you can see throughout the full movement?

      In a similar vein, I never understood having a “dominant eye”. I honestly don’t really understand the concept, I guess most people’s brains will cancel out information from one eye?

      • Ghoelian@lemmy.dbzer0.com
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        3 个月前

        My eyes still focus automatically (though a bit slow sometimes). But if I want to, I can get my eyes out of focus pretty easily.

        • moonlight@fedia.io
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          0
          ·
          3 个月前

          Yeah I can defocus my eyes too, I assume most people can. I’ve never heard of someone being able to see during saccades though.

      • lagoon8622@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        3 个月前
        • Hold out your arm at arm’s length
        • Make a circle with your thumb and index finger
        • Look through the circle at an object on the other side of the room -Now slowly bring the circle back to your eye, such that your fingers never obscure the object, and it’s always centered in the circle

        Which eye did your circle arrive at?

        !That’s your dominant eye!<

        • moonlight@fedia.io
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          0
          ·
          3 个月前

          I’ve heard of this test before, and it makes no sense to me. If I focus on a distant object, I see two images of my hand, one for each eye. So I’d have to choose which one to put over the object.

            • moonlight@fedia.io
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              0
              ·
              2 个月前

              Not at all, I perceive depth fine.

              If I focus back on my hand, the two images align, and I see both images of the background. It’s just that I’m always seeing information from both eyes.

              If anything, from my perspective it’s everyone else who I would expect to have difficulties with depth perception. You’re only perceiving one eye consciously, (In the binocular overlap region), and the other eye is just used for depth information by your subconscious, is that correct?

              • Ziglin (it/they)@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                English
                arrow-up
                0
                ·
                edit-2
                2 个月前

                No the brain does funky stuff mixing the pictures together. If I move something close enough to my face it appears in view twice seemingly semi-transparent. The rest of my visual perception remains unaffected though.

                Are you also constantly aware of your blind spot(s)? (Something that with the single image is completely invisible)

  • Especially_the_lies@startrek.website
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    0
    ·
    3 个月前

    Apparently, it isn’t normal to just space out during a test. Yeah, I went through K-12, undergrad, and grad school with an undiagnosed learning disability. This was only one of the symptoms…

      • WindyRebel@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        3 个月前

        I’ve never been diagnosed with a learning disability and I would often space out sometimes during a test. The brain gets tired and needs a break/reset before going back to the task. Now, if it was constant or for long periods of time, maybe that’s different? I’m not a doctor and this person didn’t specify.

  • superkret@feddit.org
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    0
    ·
    3 个月前

    Getting locked in the basement without water, or thrown out into the streets for half a day, when you misbehaved as a child.

    • tetris11@lemmy.ml
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      0
      ·
      3 个月前

      I mean, yeah? Is that really so bad. I guess it depends what the intent was. The town I grew up in was pretty tame, and the room I’d get locked in without food or water if I’d misbehaved had books

      • MoonlightFox@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        3 个月前

        I was locked outside of the house for long periods of time and had to drink from the garden hose / garden faucet, and pee in the bushes. We also had like 10+ apple trees. It wasn’t that bad. A bit boring sometimes.

        But that’s because it was outside and I could get my needs covered and meet friends.

        Locked inside without these needs covered for extended periods is a lot worse in my opinion. Even cats and dogs have those needs covered.

        It’s also about the lack of freedom when locked inside.

        I would not treat my own children like I was treated, and especially not like you were.

        • tetris11@lemmy.ml
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          0
          ·
          edit-2
          3 个月前

          Yeah, I just remember it being boring too. I’m also not really a person who can’t go a few hours without water, so I never felt I was being neglected.

          I dont think I’d lock my kid indoors, but I do admit that when it happened to me after I’d been fighting my siblings or something, it was just treated as a time where I would chill out and read a book to wind down. Once dinner was ready, I’d get called for dinner, and everything seemed normal.

          So I’d probably try to create a cool down zone with my kids if I ever have them, maybe a comfy chair they’re not allowed to leave for a few hours?

          • Paper_Phrog@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            0
            ·
            3 个月前

            Children (humans) should always have access to clean water. That is not normal in the slightest. A time out shouldn’t include torture.

            • thebestaquaman@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              0
              ·
              3 个月前

              I agree that “people should have access to clean water”. Let’s not confuse sending a child to their room to wind down when they’re throwing a fit with torture.

              No one takes harm from lack of water in a mild climate over the course of a couple hours. The reason it’s bad to lock a kid in the basement (or any other room) is that you’re taking away their freedom (which may be, to some point, justified and correct) and potentially making it harder for them to trust you. However, kids also need to learn that there are limits to how you can behave, and consequences for breaking those limits. Where the limit between “reasonable consequences for teaching children” and “trust-breaking punishment” lies is a fair discussion to have. No need to pull “locking a kid in their room is torture” into it.

              • Paper_Phrog@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                0
                ·
                2 个月前

                No, that’s mostly fair, and it wasn’t my point to state that sending a kid to their room equals torture. But I hope you can understand that witholding water is not a good thing, ever. Kids might not express (or fleven feel) the thirst. And that can definitely be a bad thing. Take into account possible emotions that involve crying or just warm weather etc. and they could easily get dehydrated. Losing just a few % of bodyweight water can be negatively impacting already.

                • thebestaquaman@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  0
                  ·
                  2 个月前

                  We seem to agree here: I’m by no means advocating that you should ever explicitly withhold water from a thirsty kid. I just think a lot of people here have gone over-the-top regarding how horrible it is to send a kid to their room without putting a bottle of water in there first. It’s not like feeling thirsty for a bit or getting slightly dehydrated is in any way detrimental to anyone’s health. People get thirsty and lightly dehydrated all the time, either on hiking trips or because they forgot to bring water for something that lasts a while.

                  The important thing, as I see it, is that you never put the kid in a situation where they honestly begin to doubt whether you care about their well-being and are going to look after them.

              • Rekorse@sh.itjust.works
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                0
                ·
                2 个月前

                I don’t think it counts as locking them away without food or water if they don’t become thirsty or hungry while grounded. Grounding my son for an hour, technically he has no water or food, but if he asked for it I’d give it to him.

                • thebestaquaman@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  0
                  ·
                  2 个月前

                  Exactly “locking away without food or water” makes it sound like the time perspective we’re talking about is long enough that access to food and water are necessary within that time span.

                  I would say you should never lock away a kid for so long that they need access to food and water at all.

      • tomi000@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        3 个月前

        The only acceptable intent would be something like saving your child from a murderer assaulting your family and there not being enough time for supplies.

      • Cenotaph@mander.xyz
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        3 个月前

        I think how rough the punishment is really depends on how long you strand the child for

        • tetris11@lemmy.ml
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          0
          ·
          3 个月前

          half a day seems like peanuts though – though I guess it really does depend how the kid feels about it

          • its_prolly_fine@sh.itjust.works
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            0
            ·
            edit-2
            3 个月前

            Dude no! Like a 15 minute time out is ok. But if they ask for water they should be given it. Locked away alone in a room without supervision for hours? No. That is not normal. At all.

            • SorteKanin@feddit.dk
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              0
              ·
              3 个月前

              Like a 15 minute time out is ok.

              Locked in a room or locked out of the house? That is not okay, regardless of how long it is.

              • cyberfae@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                English
                arrow-up
                0
                ·
                2 个月前

                I think they meant standing in the corner or sitting in a chair for the duration of the timeout

                • SorteKanin@feddit.dk
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  0
                  ·
                  2 个月前

                  Tbh I think even such a thing is not that great for children. Certainly not traumatic or close to it, but just not very effective I would guess.

      • shottymcb@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        2 个月前

        Average lemmy.ml user be like:

        I mean, yeah? Is that really so bad. I guess it depends what the intent was. The town I grew up in was pretty tame, and the room I’d get locked in without food or water if I’d misbehaved had books

  • Strider@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    0
    ·
    3 个月前

    Well, the feeling of one side of your hip being out of place. Then twisting slightly to snap it back.

    It’s hip displasia.

    • Pirata@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      0
      ·
      3 个月前

      On this same note, as an European it was insane for me to learn that school shootings like Sandy Hook, those are just the ones that go famous for some reason.

      But in reality hundreds more happen throughout the year that don’t go “viral” so they don’t get reported at all.

      Truly mind-boggling.

      • shalafi@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        edit-2
        3 个月前

        Not true. If a single child is shot, or even shot at, it’s national headline news. Caveat: That doesn’t apply to inner-city children shooting each other. We, uh, don’t talk about that.

        If you look at some stats a “school shooting” is any time a gun goes off on school property. I could go down to the elementary school and pop one off at midnight. School shooting.

        “Mass shootings” go this way as well. We all have an event in mind when that term comes up. There’s quite a gap when you look at lies, damned lies and statistics. :) You might note that Mother Jones and The Violence Project are anything by conservative sources.

        • ouRKaoS@lemmy.today
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          0
          ·
          2 个月前

          Four victims is what it takes for a shooting to be considered a “mass shooting”.

          This is a ridiculous number, because it seems too low & too high at the same time.

      • BenjiRenji@feddit.org
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        3 个月前

        We had to do active shooter training when I started my job at an US companyin Europe. That was weird.

  • Cryophilia@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    0
    ·
    2 个月前

    My first long term relationship was with a woman who could orgasm from penetration in less than a minute.

  • Lux (it/they)@lemmy.blahaj.zone
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    0
    ·
    3 个月前

    Homophobia

    I was raised in a right wing, rural area, and i didn’t meet a gay person til higschool. When he said he was gay, i assumed he was joking.

    Im trans now lol

    • Angry_Autist (he/him)@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      0
      ·
      2 个月前

      Grew up semi-rural south and same thing but my parents took me to see The Birdhouse for some reason (I was 14) and I was like “OH!”

      Not gay myself, but thankfully I did not grow up to be the bigoted person my parents wanted me to be.

      • Scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        3 个月前

        There’s a reason cities are more liberal. Turns out being surrounded by different cultures, races, sexualities, and beliefs shows you that maybe they’re not so different. In a town of 15k middle American white folks, it’s hard to see another culture equally, let alone at all.

        Same thing with college. There’s no such thing as a liberal or democratic college. It’s just that people are simply surrounded by other people. You learn all of those weird rules and things you were taught don’t actually hold up, and that everyone is kind of the same

      • TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        3 个月前

        if my grandma were to be believed my dad’s babysitter when he was 4 years old infected him with homosexuality then he passed it onto his children because one (me) is trans and the other is bisexual

        She’s not very harmful about it but is just really damn confused lol

        • stelelor@lemmy.ca
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          0
          ·
          3 个月前

          So if I get this right, your dad turned homosexual from his babysitter… Then proceeded to have two, presumably biologic, kids?

          • phlegmy@sh.itjust.works
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            0
            ·
            3 个月前

            Nah the dad was too strong to be brainwashed by the babysitter’s sexual deviance. But those poor baby sperm overhead everything and became infected with the gay.

          • TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            0
            ·
            edit-2
            3 个月前

            presumably biologic kids

            Yeah, my dad fell for the “get a woman to protect you from same sex attraction” propaganda. Over the years he changed his mind and learned that it’s not something to be ashamed of, but he was in a relationship with kids now.

            when I came out and my mom was very verbally abusive he kinda had the realization that the relationship wasn’t benefiting the children either. Also my mom was very very controlling over who he could talk to/make friends with.

            He is currently in the process of a divorce after 22 years and is coming to terms with how he let fear control his life for that long.

            It’s kinda sad.

      • Pirata@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        3 个月前

        These must be the so called trans reading bed time stories turning kids gay i keep hearing so much about. /s