Republicans are drunk with power. What a stupid fucking idea. There’s no chance of banning porn. Then they wouldn’t be able to jerk to Trans women and feel shame after.

Trans women are hot, in case that reads as though the shame is correct. It’s not.

  • cassie 🐺@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    5 hours ago

    I feel there’s some parallels here with fat shaming. (and addiction shaming in general) People exposed to judgemental attitudes about their weight are measurably more likely to become obese, no matter their initial weight. Shaming can make one more fixated on their desire for food, and when that desire is in the front of one’s mind, it raises the psychological effort required to resist the urge for comfort in food. That effort is not infinite and will eventually run out, which is why white-knuckling through a diet tends to not lead to permanent results.

    Misinformed sex education teaches us to feel shame for sexual urges most everyone has, and in a similar capacity could make one more fixated on that urge. If one instead has a positive view toward their sexuality, they do not have to cope with insecurities that remind them of temptation toward something they’re not supposed to do but would be immensely pleasurable. They just do it from time to time and it doesn’t bleed into the rest of their life.

    idk a bit personal but, I find accepting all parts of my sexuality (especially the parts that make me feel icky) has made me much less prone to risky behavior. shame makes it difficult to make good decisions. I’m a lot more clearheaded now and can just enjoy physical affection with someone I love. I can communicate what I’d enjoy and set appropriate boundaries. fantasy and reality are more well separated now. importantly, I am more satisfied at a baseline and therefore seeking out sex less on the whole.

    Body and sex positivity works extremely well as a means of coping with primal urges, not only because it makes us feel better about parts of us that will never go away, but also because accepting them actually leads to better self-control and decisionmaking.

    • Grool The Demon@lemmy.world
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      4 hours ago

      No doubt. I think especially in childhood and early adult hood there are a lot of things that get muddled and tied up in shame where coping mechanisms and real self reflection needs to be ingrained earlier. There’s so many little hurdles to overcome in life but having a good foundation probably makes it overall easier.

    • obvs@lemmy.world
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      4 hours ago

      Fat shaming makes people feel hopeless and actually encourages depression which causes overeating.

      People who fat shame KNOW they are causing people to be fat. They’re not fat shaming out of concern for others.

      It is openly to damage those other people’s lives, because the people doing the shaming are looking for a way to make themselves feel good, and fat shaming gives them a positive feeling.