This is becoming more common in my town. I just either feel like an ass saying I dont have cash, or lying, but I also can’t be giving out 20’s to everyone who asks.
I feel bad for most of them but at the same time I get anxiety walking down the sidewalk and seeing someone up ahead that I know is going to ask me for money. Its not like you can say “oh no, I donate to services that help the needy” because that person isn’t necessarily being helped by that. And ignoring completely feels so mean, plus I tried that one time and the person was screaming at me as i walked away that I ignored them.
I also dont want my city to round them up and send them to prison camps, something they are planning and that I know a lot of people would vote for just to “get rid of them” but im not supporting that at all.
Its tough.
If I’m entering a place that has food of any kind I’ll just ask what they want, I’ve rarely been asked for something that exceeds $5-10. More often than not they eat, pack up their stuff and leave after that. They feel acknowledged, I feel good for helping and I also hopefully didn’t contribute to the drug issue.
I made it a personal rule that if I have a $5, it goes to whoever asks. I don’t seek people out, but if it’s asked, and I have that five dollar bill with me, it’s theirs.
Peacefully coexisting is the hope imo. Just leave people alone, offer help if you can, otherwise wish them well.
Anyone harassing either has drug or mental issues, not much you can do but limit interactions.
Sound like asylums may be returning, so that will probably be horrible.
deleted by creator
i give them money, just $10. I feel bad and I’ll be thinking about it all day. Even if they do something wrong with it at least they know someone cared
When I was driving through an area frequently that had a large amount of homeless I’d pack a few extra sandwiches, granola bars and bottles of water to give out. I also kept gallon bags and a large bag of dog food for those who had dogs. I never once had someone turn down food and ask for money instead.
Guess it depends on your city. In my city I have literally seen a homeless person throw food back at the person who gave it to them and scream “I ASKED FOR A DOLLAR, BITCH!”
You sure this isn’t a scene in scary movie?
LMAO it literally is
Word for word lol
it was actually from ISAIP, when dee gave a sandwich to a homeless person, and the person threw back to her, give a dollar you bitch.
Probably is, but it also happened in my city. My city’s gone to meth in a real bad way.
Fair enough
I’ve seen people get angry when instead of giving money they offered to buy food.
Called the bluff about needing the money to eat, I guess.
Yeah you gotta mostly ignore the homeless where I’m at. Heavy meth, fentanyl area. Street violence is not uncommon. Just keep it moving and don’t loiter too long if you know what’s good lol
same here,
“I’m, uh, gluten intolerant. And I don’t eat processed foods.”
Literally not even once. But keep strawmanning the homeless to make yourself feel better
Uh…I was just playing off of your last sentence, where you brought up the idea that someone could turn down food. I was imagining a scenario where someone would do that.
You can get down off your high horse if you’d like.
I had a homeless guy come up and give me a whole story about how he almost died of low blood sugar that morning. I’m a caregiver for a diabetic person, so I gave him a whole sealed package of emergency glucose tabs.
He looked it over and gave it back, said the only thing that helped his blood sugar was a certain flavor of Rockstar energy drink. He gave me a list and asked me to go buy things. It was in a Safeway parking lot, so tried to get what he asked.
They didn’t have his flavor of rockstars and they didn’t have organic raspberries, so I got conventional and a different flavor. He gave them back to me. I asked if he could give them away himself, he said it would be too much hassle.
He still asks me for stuff when I go to that Safeway, it’s his hang out. The first time after that I said “no, you were kind of a dick last time.” Now I just ignore him. I feel bad.
But, I have a hard rule for myself that if I’m going into a restaurant and someone asks me to get them some food, I get it for them. It’s often hard for them to even tell me what they want beyond “Just anything!”
Take it easy, Jesus! 😁
If possible, do not give food unless it is sealed. I prefer to give out canned food with a pull tab or sealed items like protein bars and granola bars. Many unhoused people throw away open items like sandwiches given to them by random people for their own safety, and I can’t blame them
deleted by creator
I feed them, get them any medical care they need and help them get into section 8 housing.
And then they introduce me to their friends to do the same for them.
Or they were just trying to play on people’s sympathy for money and avoid me like the plague.
Are you sure you do all those things while you’re trying to get from point A to B like the OP, or you’re carving out separate time to go do those things? Seems like you couldn’t accomplish anything else downtown if you’re feeding and arranging medical care and housing for every panhandler you come across.
Not many panhandlers are along my routes. Mostly because I have been doing it for years.
If 1 in a 1000 people consistently did so, then we might finally get the homeless problem solved. (Assuming that your local community has a housing the homeless policy rather than a beating up the poor policy like most places)
At home: Nothing. Genuine homelessness isn’t really a problem. There’s this joke that we have a government programme called “winter” that takes care of this. Truth is, there are actual government programmes in place that takes care of this as well - It is written in law that anyone who cannot afford a place to stay, as well as basic necessities will have this covered.
Abroad: When not in what causes fox news talking heads to clutch their pearls over socialist hellscape societies (Norway), I’m a lot more giving. Plus, I usually carry some currency that I will no longer need once I leave. I especially remember the happy outcry of a beggar I visited in this developing country that I happened to walk past on my way to pick up some supplies the last day before heading for home. Repeated “Bless you!”-s once he realized that the stack of leftover cash included quite a few 20$ bills.
In short, he obviously needed them more than I, so I gave what I could.
I’ve lived in Norway for 5 years now. The only people I see asking for money are well known to locals, and I suspect that the majority of them weren’t born here either and have been forced to do this by someone else, who is perhaps holding their passports? Idk, it’s almost all women or disabled men that… don’t look Norwegian, and they all hive signs with Vipps numbers (cashapp/venmo for those not familiar). There is also one Norwegian guy in town who is always hustling people and tourists with the same story about how he just needs money for the train ride to Voss, so he can go to rehab there. I came here from San Francisco so it was a huge culture shock to see so few down on their luck, and even then, largely keeping out of your face. I don’t feel threatened, I just feel badly for them.
Yeah, there was this trend starting 15-20ish years ago where people from Eastern Europe came here to beg. Apparently it’s profitable to travel all the way to set up shop. I never give these people anything. If they truly were so down on their luck as they claim to be, they probably would not be able to invest the necessary resources into traveling across the continent to begin with.
Norwegians saw this:
And said “What if we weren’t stupid and used it for something good”
If you can afford it, you can ask if you can buy them a coffee and inexpensive meal. Remember declinations of specific food items doesn’t mean they’re conning. Maybe they’re allergic or can’t eat/drink particular things for reasons.
deleted by creator
I’ve struggled with this like you for years. My empathy fights with my practicality.
I usually carry some cash and if I have small bills I may give a buck or two to someone. This is more and more rare for me because it’s hard to know who really needs it.
More often, I usually just smile and look them in the eye to acknowledge their humanity. If they ask I just say I’m sorry I don’t have cash.
When I lived in a city I never gave money but I did offer canned or sealed food. I have also given away my used camping gear.
I donate to a charity that I know will help (they’ve helped family members in the past), Shelter, but I genuinely say to those who ask me around my town that I have no change
I used to give fairly often, but after handing one of the more famous homeless folks in my community a 5 spit and him immediately saying “thanks man, I’m going to go buy a beer with this” I took a hard think and realized I don’t want to enable that lifestyle. I mean a beer is fine every once in a while, but I’d rather see the guy have a safe environment where he can drink it.
So now instead I donate to our local hospitality house every time someone asks me for some change.
Panhandling is a numbers game - both parties know this and it’s okay to say no.
If I were to go back to walking into work and dealing with it daily then I’d have my headphones on and would be ignoring.
20s? Someone recently told me “my dad taught me to always carry some change with me, other people need it more than me” and now I’m doing it too. There really isn’t any other way to act if you pride yourself on your humanity, anything else is rationalizing selfishness. And I often hear the “they’re just gonna use it for booze/drugs!!!” line as if it meant anything. Sure, they might, but even if you’re a strict teetotaler (and if you’re in any Western country odds are you’re not, lol), what else would they do? Have you ever slept on a cold floor while hungry? People kill themselves/complain about life and they have beds, meals, narcotics and internet connections, nvm all sorts of legal drugs to help them cope with everything (something like 15 percent of women in the US are on antidepressants, according to the CDC…). Life is hard sometimes, perhaps they also need to disconnect a bit, idk.
Give when you can, dont rationalize it when you can’t. We’re all collectively responsible for the playground God made for us and everything/one in it, but you’re also just one man/woman. Maybe they’ll turn their lives around, maybe your grain of sand helped them reach that point.
thanks for bringing some kindness to this thread. i’ve been meaning to go to the bank to get a bunch of fivers to hand out.
Definitely do it. It is a great feeling and helps them. Don’t let the fear of being scammed prevent you from helping people.
