This happened more than 15 years ago and is a pretty wild ride. I may have a few minor details askew, but this is the basic story.

There was this police officer who was operating as a controller for another undercover police officer. A controller is the interface between the undercover guy and his team in the office. It allows the undercover guy to operate loose as a goose and the controller runs about behind the scenes making things happen.

Well, one night the controller gets completely hammered, off his tits drunk, then picks up a hooker and takes her to a dodgy motel and has sex. Then he passes out. The hooker couldn’t wake him, so she takes his car keys and drives to where she was picked up from and abandons his undercover car with the keys still in the ignition.

Back in the hotel, the controller wakes up to find the car gone - along with suitcase containing several thousand dollars that was sitting in the trunk. Every note in the stash, naturally, had the serial number recorded.

The controller panicked and called a bunch of off-duty and on-duty friends who attempted to locate the car, and hopefully the drug-buy cash, before they had to officially report what happened.

In the end, they couldn’t find the car, so the controller self-reported the whole sorry story. He was arrested and sacked, but didn’t do time. They eventually found the car, still with the keys in the ignition and the cash still sitting in the trunk, safe and sound. All his friends got into various amounts of trouble for assisting with the cover-up.

Bonus points. While this wild escapade was happening the controller’s wife was sitting at home with a newborn baby.

It is still talked about today - with reverence - as the single biggest display of mass stupidity in the department.

Dishwasher was a legit creep. Proved management inaction took almost a year to get rid of them.

Jacked 5 ft 5 black guy.

Would talk extremely close to female servers. One time parked someone in and kept asking them questions like where you live etc. Talked about his jail time openly. Would get angry and just yell in the dish pit. One time said “hey what’s that other car in your driveway” to a woman.

The ex gang member who taught me to cook said he was the kind of guy who enjoyed the gay in jail. Institutionalized to a degree. Was a dish washing machine.

Hit on my boyfriend and would look down his shirt, be like look good in them jeans etc. In same month would emotionally abuse him to tears.

One time recall going up to him and saying someone was obviously not interested because she was new, visibly scared with him next to her when she was just trying to prep. People could hear him yell at me from the dining area, but after that he was different in a good way with me. Typical abuser workplace shit that thrived on inaction. Could have killed me if he wanted of course.

Bizarre man. Forget why he was finally let go but everyone breathed a little easier…

Until the woman with BPD started lol

When I worked in data entry fresh our of college, there was a mass firing. Turns out people were signing in and leaving. Like, to go to the movies, to the store, to just hang out, for their entire shift, and would then log out at the end of the day. Damn near every person under 30 was gone. Some quit before they could get fired. It took all day, and there were plenty of performances. Now, it was data entry, which meant our activity was tracked, from the inactivity to how much we got through in a day. I have no idea how they didn’t think anyone would notice.

I’ve had 2 coworkers lose their jobs for being diddlers, but nothing other than that really. Only other one 8 have, I didn’t get to witness since I was living out of town at the time, but a shithead ex-boss got walked out by some feds and wasn’t seen again. Gossip was it was INS, and it would serve him right to get deported.

From my current workplace:
Someone was putting mail in a cabinet under their desk instead of the outbox, we’re talking hundreds of letters/cheques/invoices and some life-changing documents from a few months.
The mail outbox was on their desk, and easier to reach than the cabinet.

From previous workplaces:

• Breaking down a door and raping someone that had barricaded themselves behind said door.
• Sexual interference.
• not having a licence, and getting a DUI with a work truck that they stole.

And outrageous in a different way:
for only beating last year’s sales by 3% instead of by 4%.

I used to unload trucks in an absolute madhouse.

The heat in the back of the transparent roofed trailers in summer was a nightmare so some of the lads would strip down to their boxers then pop their boots and high vis back on. We eventually got cameras installed pointing down the trailers and we’re suddenly required to be fully clothed at all times. Our shift lead took particular offense to this and flashed his cock at the camera whilst shouting obscenities. He didn’t come back to work the next day.

We had 4 guys sacked for not only opening customers parcels but for taking fireworks out of said parcel and taping them to Frisbees which they then threw to each other. One inevitably went off in one fella’s hand. He eventually managed to sue for unfair dismissal somehow.

Another guy was caught trying to sneak a slab of wine out to his car.

We had a new group in from another regional site come for training.

It turned out the one was actively also a prostitute. She was freely distributing her social media, showing people videos of herself, and asking us where the secluded parts of the campus were so she could do her thing with some of the scientists.

She didn’t do very much actual work, or at least not what she was supposed to be doing there. I give her credit for seeming to be very proud of her side gig. She seemed to really enjoy it. I think she just eventually stopped coming in after they went back to their own site, so maybe she did find herself a scientist.

Definitely the wildest person I’ve ever worked with.

Not exactly crazy but just mysterious…this was at a software company I worked at many years ago. It was one of the developers in the team adjacent to ours who I worked with occasionally - nice enough person, really friendly and helpful, everyone seemed to get on with them really well and generally seemed like a pretty competent developer. Nothing to suggest any kind of gross misconduct was happening.

Anyway, we all went off to get lunch one day and came back to an email that this person no longer worked at the company, effective immediately. Never saw them again.

No idea what went down - but the culture at that place actually became pretty toxic after a while, which led to a few people (including me) quitting - so maybe they dodged a bullet.

Worked at sheetmetal manufacturing plant. Had aisles of welding booths. Old dude welder would smoke in the building in his booth letting the smoke get sucked through the table vents. Well sure as ahit one day a little more than just smoke gets sucked up and next thing you know thr whole ventilation system goes up in flames. Never saw the dude again.

Same plant but one of the robot welders, the worker would mount an unrelated electrical box on the robot welder rig. Then hit the foot petal and it would clamp 3 of the 4 sides down with a fuckton of pressure. Months after opening back up after ventilation fire this new chick was running the robot welders and steps on the fucking clamp petal while still holding everything in place. She clamped her whole hand smashing all the bones in her hand I think. Never saw her again either. It was a freak accident not even anything you can point a finger at. I guess she lost balance a little to make her step and didn’t have her hands in way so the e-stop light bar that senses if you are in the way wasn’t tripped but she slamed her hand onto the box as it was closing trying to catch herself.

They had tons of people I never saw before come in and assess the robots and turret presses and they installed the petals that have covering flaps you need to lift to get your foot in the petal. All in all the place was super safe and the dude that smoked was super fucking belligerent and was going to be fired the next infraction before burning the ventilation system down.

An IT company I worked for many years ago went through a massive growing phase. One of the things that lead to this growth was the hiring of much more competent management, particularly in security and the data center.

Security actually started doing their jobs and started routinely doing network scans. They discovered two servers that were not located in the data center, which was a huge no no. The servers were running two porn websites off the company’s internet connection. He had been doing it for years and apparently was making many times his company salary from them.

This guy in the warehouse made a deal with another guy to sell his porn collection. So he brings it in one day in a big cardboard box and leaves it sitting in the coat room with the top open, you could see X-rated stuff just walking by. Someone says something to management and the box gets confiscated, but they don’t know who it belongs to so that’s pretty much the end of it. Until our hero goes and files a complaint about the theft of his property.

A manager got fired for sleeping with an underage waitress.

A GM got fired after stealing ~$13k from deposits

A guy got fired for telling the GM to go fuck herself completely unprompted.

Food service is wild

It’s health care so obviously we were told that we’d have to be vaccinated against COVID or be fired, like many. Most people went along with it, but the CEO sent out a final warning email to the whole network, and this antivax dingdong somehow managed to reply all to the CEO giving him a patronizing lecture about how COVID wasn’t real, how nobody had died of it, and how he had read several patient charts that proved this, and how the CEO was making a very big mistake, and how he, this clerk, knew science better than the CEO did. He was fired for reading patient charts he didn’t belong in, of course. The email was super patronizing and he claimed to have an M.Sc and that meant he knew better, despite the fact he was working as a clerk, and gave all sorts of false “evidence”.

Anyway he was fired and reply all to the CEO is disabled.

We had an A/P manager who chewed her way through 3 entire staffs before management decided the problem was actually her. Two of them collectively quit in a group on one day! That was the most outrageous I think. How did it take FIFTEEN people quitting because of her management before they fired her?

Also one manager who came in shitface drunk and swinging when she got fired. That was the most dramatic.

Jerking it in the bathroom

It wasn’t even the unisex one