I’m 20F, he’s 25M. We met in January and have been dating since last month. He’s already met my parents - they love him, and he hangs out at our house all the time. Literally no one has any issues with him, he’s super welcome here. I invited him to sleep over for a few days this week just for fun, but he said he’s not comfortable with it - apparently it feels too “intimate” for him? Like, he’s got this thing about doing private stuff with other people around. I just want him to relax a bit. We’re all adults here, and everyone knows people have private lives. How can I help him feel more okay with it?
He’s right to feel uncomfortable because it’s inappropriate. My kids are 19 and 21 and while I am hopeful/happy for them to have intimate adult relationships they find fulfilling I don’t have any interest in those relationships happening under my roof with what is essentially a stranger. My son has been in a relationship with a nice young woman for about a year and a half and while I would have no issue with them sharing a room I wouldn’t want my 19 year old sharing her room with a freshly found boyfriend or vice versa, it is intimate and I care about the quality of my kids relationships and if they’re dating someone who doesn’t respect that I don’t want causal sex going on in my house I don’t know how quality this person they’re dating even is… for me, as the parent in this situation is that this feels way too much like casual sex which I feel isn’t in most people’s best interests. Hook up else where and figure it out six months down the road
That’s because Zenith is being a weird puritanical dork that thinks their adult children aren’t their own people, OP, don’t mind them.
If your parents feel the same way they can tell you themselves like an adult.
Yeah. Young adults are going to have sex.
They can have sex in the safe home where they live. Or they can have sex in less safe places like parties, frat houses, in cars where they can collect a public indecency charge, etc…
That’s the choice you get to make as a parent.