every time we go out to eat, I take like two bites and feel like throwing up, and I’m not one to get nauseous easily. this only started when we started dating (wed been best friends for 3 years or so up until that)
its not new food, I’ve been to these places many times before
Perfume?
You’ve known each other for 3 years? Wow that’s cool! How long did you know you liked her?
like 2 years. I was too dense to see she liked me back, she was too shy to say anything. were here now I guess 🤷♂️
Nice. I imagine you have been looking forward to dating a lot?
yep
Makes sense that there would be some nerves involved then. Even if you’re not feeling them consciously. I’m sure there’s a risk to dating someone you’ve built such a good friendship with.
Good on you for going for it!
I have a similar issue sometimes. I feel like I get overstimulated by smells in restaurants… Also I’m lazy so I eat boring food at home, so maybe the variety contributes to the nausea.
Also I’m celiac, which definitely doesn’t help.
probably due to inflation and the price increase 🤷🏻
Anxiety?
If that tiny idiot of an amygdala in your brain thinks you’re in danger then nausea can be a symptom.
Placebo effect?
Maybe you got a touch of food poisoning one of the first times and now you subconsciously associate it with date nights?Fun fact! When the effect on your health is negative instead of positive it’s known as the nocebo effect.
…
Well, I thought that fact was fun…
Are you just really nervous about being on a date?
I don’t think so? but that could be a factor I suppose
Your brain has a mind of its own!
As does your gut!
Are there awkward pauses during your dinners? Do you think about things to talk about beforehand?
I guess maybe try to observe what happens just before you get sick each time.
we’ve been friends for long enough that there’s never really any awkward silence
silence, sure, but not awkward
It’s called an anxiety attack. Talk to a therapist about it.
too poor for therapy lol (I need it but womp womp)
I’ve heard great things about these self-help tools from the Australian Centre for Clinical Interventions: https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/Resources/Looking-After-Yourself/Social-Anxiety
Then journal. Dump your thoughts onto paper, consider and reconsider. Just write out what you think. It can be a text file, a paper notebook with pen, whatever. Just write a lot.
yeah that could help, I’ve just always been a “bottle it up and call it a day” kind of guy
dunno, my mental health has been improving now that I’m out of school honestly so well see
I find it helpful sometimes to write down the negative shit then wad it up and throw it away or burn the paper.
Seriously, journaling has been extremely helpful, I only started doing it after I started talking to a professional (other than a few classes in school) and it makes our talks infinitely more productive. It really really really helps me organize my thoughts and emotions in a way that just letting the day wash over me and rolling with with it does not.
You need time to process your thoughts and feelings. You can effectively “mini” counsel yourself just by stepping back and getting a different perspective. Words are powerful things and when you’re forced to slow down and try to summarize the incredibly complex emotional/psychological feelings we all have every day it can help you deal with things and give you insight into yourself, it’s a very powerful tool we can all use.
Don’t bottle up. That was the whole point of Inside Out. You have to experience the emotions.
Don’t bottle it up. Decades of experience talking here. Do what you can to come to terms with your feelings, thoughts, etc. Then find a job that has good mental health care and see a therapist.
Advice: you will likely need to try out a couple before you find the right one. When you’re comfortable with someone, you’ll know.
Except for at the beginning of dinner dates.
Do you at least acknowledge it’s psychological? That unless she’s dosing your first bite with ipecac, there’s no physical reason to feel nauseous during the first couple bites of dinner dates?
That does not sound like an anxiety attack.
Oh, really Doctor?
And while you’re disqualifying trauma victims, are there any rape victims you’d like to tell “had it coming” or were “just imagining things”?
Since, with your psychic powers, you know so much. …
“I disagree! Also: rape.”
You’re the one playing psychic doctor by diagnosing mental illness over the internet based on little to no information.
Op asked for advice here. This isn’t a free for all to go accuse everyone willing to give advice as ‘playing doctor’. That’s straight up troll behavior.
Whilst i dont agree with them that this is an anxiety attack (although it does sound like it’s potentially related to anxiety or nerves) i dont think it’s fair to put them down for “playing psychic doctor” as you put it.
OP came to lemmy to ask for people to help them determine the cause of this problem. They are asking people to, at least in some way, “play doctor”
I k ow there is little information to go on but for all.we know the person your replied to might actually be a doctor and GPs do telephone appoi tments where you tell them your symptoms and they diagnose over the phone.
This isn’t a far stretch from that. I just think a lot of assumptions have been made here, and therefore, you aren’t much better than the “doctor” you are responding to.
(Having said all that, they blew a gasket whe you called them out, so perhaps they are a little too sensitive to be someone who needs composure, like a doctor)
Tell me more about what I’m thinking as you reading my mind
While you’re at it, open up a drive-thru, since you’re also a world-class projector.
What the fuck is up with this kind of behaviour on Lemmy tonight? So many people flying off the handle at the slightest hint of disagreement.
You need to chill the fuck out. Also, if they’re a world-class projector they should open a drive-IN not a drive-thru. This is cringy ass behaviour. Smh
Nausea is a common symptom. Maybe you haven’t experienced it but it doesn’t mean it’s not a symptom for others.
Are you reacting to her perfume? Maybe she didn’t put it on when you were just friends.
no she definetly did, same one as always, and its not strong
also that would make me nauseous in the car as well, not just when eating
Does she chew with her mouth open?
Does she stink?
Try cooking dinner at home together and see if it happens.
It’s because you’re pregnant.
But on all seriousness, some say that there are cases when the would-be-father also feels nauseous with food when the girl gets pregnant.
Studio audience: OOOOOOOO!!!
Pregante.
am I gregnant?
can u burn a luigi board?
Is you prefnet?
don’t think that’s a possibility currently
very interesting tho
Maybe she’s poisoning you just a tiny bit at a time. Kidding, but have you guys eaten a meal at home together without you feeling sick?
not really, she came over once and we ate like polish crepes i made, and that was fine, but not much of a meal, no
I would try that a few more time, the fact that you were doing something will help with any anxiety
Maybe there’s something you need to get off your chest. Maybe you feel like you’re not being true to yourself.
If you feel like something needs to change in your relationship, better to put it out there and work through it than keep it hidden.
