aka: Burglary of your home, Car break-in, Your bedroom getting searched by someone (Parents/Roomates/Housemates/ or even Burglars), Your Backpack, Personal Electronics/Phone/Computer/etc getting searched, etc.
Basically, anything that can be considered “personal space”.
Why I ask?
Well… My parent’s car has signs of being searched through last night, stuff were all over the car, now I hate the idea of getting into that car again (someone might’ve slept inside the car, blegh 😖). That car feels so “tainted” now.
Like this cant be only my feeling right? Like, you just feel disgusted after someone touch your things against your will (especially if they are strangers).
Someone broke into my house through a window and stole nothing, left through the front door… I still wonder what happened there.
My house was broken into last Christmas, just about a year ago exactly. I understand what you mean, it feels like a violation of your space in the most personal way, even when you weren’t there to witness the deed. It sucks. All we can do is pick up the pieces though- give the car interior a good clean, maybe a long with some of the things rummaged through. Also think about what you can do to prevent the situation going forward- not to victim blame at all, but there are usually concrete things that one can do to protect against stuff like that. For example, making extra sure to lock all doors/windows and leaving the car in a well-lit area.
I’m sorry that happened to y’all, but take comfort in the fact that you are not alone in your experience.
Closest I’ve ever had is probably my dad searching my room for candy when I was younger or may be a year or so ago I went to see summer fireworks and came home to find out he went into my room and went into my electronic junk/storage dresser drawer and snagged some cookies I planned on eating when I got back later that night. I’m not super pissed about it since they were for my mom, but I’m not happy about it either, even to this day.
As for the other incidents of candy snagging when I was younger, I can’t remember anything specific so I don’t feel anything about them.
Hell yes. I’m a person who always valued my own privacy, but I didn’t have much, especially during university plus almost ten years afterwards.
I lived with my brother in his tiny apartment, and my mom was most of the time living there too. My mom is a very nosy person, and it happened sometimes that I got home to seeing my personal belongings being re-arranged, some missing.
Sometimes she would just open my cabinet right in front of me and search for something in there like it’s second nature, without even asking.
It was extremely infuriating and humiliating to me. And I feel so lucky and so peaceful now that I have my own apartment.
two breakins to my vehicle.
first time I was the idiot and left my window down and someone stole my 100 CD binder full of CDs. jokes on them, I had them all ripped to my PC anyway.
second time, someone broke into my toolbox and stole $2000 worth of tools in 5 minutes without me knowing until the next day.
I knew exactly where it happened because I had never been to that place and got lost. got a couple friends together and went back the next night, and sure enough I noticed a sketchy van with a dude in it.
I was the bait in my truck again and stopped, walked away and two dudes got out of the van and walked to my truck.
they didn’t know two of my friends were laying in the bed with wrecking bars.
I heard shouts before I got inside the store and came running back. When I got there one dude was on the ground blood pouring out his leg and his foot is kinked unusually.
the other dude was begging for us to let him go. I grabbed a framing hammer out of the cab and broke his wrist.
we then proceeded to absolutely fuck the entire van up. wasn’t even drivable anymore. flat tires, no lights, no windows, back doors bent and hanging.
I went back to the guys and told them to give me their cash. They gave me $50. I asked if this is all they got from my $2k in tools they stole the other day. they just sat there.
So I walked over, poured lighter fluid in their seats and set the van on fire.
when we left I threatened them if I ever saw them I would finish it.
drove home, got some beers and drank with the guys for the night.
do not fuck with a carpenters tools. it’s how they make their living. I was in a bad spot at the time, and most of those tools I had inherited from my father. they were more than tools to me.
no tools, no work, no work makes Jack a very bad boy. fuck thieves. I still don’t feel bad.
I asked if this is all they got from my $2k in tools they stole the other day. they just sat there.
You vigilanted different guys.
My parents felt the need to occasionally sack my room for drugs, and of course, me not having any drugs around my room usually meant they didn’t find any drugs.
They never thought to look in the PlayStation 2 expansion bay.
I’m DEA Agent Hank Schrader, OPEN THE FCK UP!
🔫
“go way, batin!”
About a year ago some tried to break into my flat at 2am. I was alone that night. They didn’t get in because I put the chain in front of the door. The following nights I always locked the door, left the key in the lock and turned to the rightmost position, put the chain on, and moved a shelf in front of it. And whenever my roomies are gone for a couple of days, I’ll lock the door. So yeah. You are not alone in this. Your feeling of safety has been challenged and that “tainted” feeling will linger for a while. I guess it’s our survival instinct trying to warn us that we may not be safe. But it will get better with time.
these are awesome. have some without alarm too
My mum felt entitled to go through any and all of my things the entire time I lived with her. Never had privacy until after I moved out. I’m pretty fucked up, mental health wise.
we had a burglary once. the guy came in the back door while my wife was showering. took her bag, my laptop and a few other things and went back outside. tried to take the car but the key he had semi-miraculously had a damaged chip in it cause it went through the dryer so it wouldnt start. he pushed it down the street trying to start it and couldnt. when we found it the drivers seat and passenger seat were covered with what seemed like dog hair. the cops had to come take it to search it for fingerprints or whatever. we found my wife’s bag down the street having been thrown into the stream. she still has the bag, vacuumed the car out and wiped it down, all good.
another time, i was living in this shared house that had a very serious reputation for having tons of parties with all kinds of drug use. several people were selling out of there (i didnt know at the time). I came home one day to find all of my drawers dumped onto the ground, mattress flipped over etc etc. The cops had come in with their dogs and flipped the whole house. cops standing on my bed in their filthy boots. broken ceramic mugs. i had nothing to do with it and they didnt find anything in my room.
the cop thing was just weird. but, after the burglary, i was paranoid for a good long while, months and months. it goes away after a time. we beefed up security significantly.
the tainted thing youre talking about though, this is psychological of course. theres nothing wrong with the car. people go through shit at airport security and things, it doesnt taint anything. this is a violation of your privacy, sure, but not your personhood. autonomy and personal space is just a concept. deer and cows and foxes and wolves and swarms of insects and people have been in the space that your house currently occupies. its just a spot on the planet some temporary walls have been put up to keep you dry. your house wont be there forever, thats a fact. later, someone something else will live where you house was. their space wasnt tainted by your presence.
just food for thought. if you have a therapist Id suggest mentioning it to them, it can help to talk about it. it almost feels like this about something else that this is a metaphor for, but you’d know if that feels true or not.
anyway, it’ll pass. it happens to everyone.
How many benches have you sat on? How many resturant chairs have you been in? How many hotels have you slept in? How many used cars have you been in? How many rentals? Oh man, the school bus?
My point is, whoever did it is just a human. Desperate perhaps, but not “unclean” or some monster that taints something. If they didn’t do damage you even have the best kind of thief on your hands.
The first time we stayed with the in-laws she repacked my luggage for me. We barely knew each other. Wasn’t that nice of her? /s
Housemates left a door open; we lived in the woods.
A squirrel got into the house. Housemates, because young men are idiots, chased the squirrel further into the house… right into my bedroom.
They then tossed literally all of my possessions around the room in an attempt to remove or kill the squirrel.
Friends, they were not successful. The squirrel escaped the room and ran further into the house.
Yes. I didn’t like it.
My old family home got burgled back in high school. Some things of value were stolen, though luckily nothing sentimental.
What was worth more than the stolen money was that I no longer felt safe in my own home. I couldn’t sleep well for a long time after that. I felt like I was sleeping out in the open. Sometimes I would hear a noise and jolt up and spend a whole hour trying to see if I could spot something weird on the camera feed (we installed CCTV).
A roommate’s girlfriend rummaged through my drawers and took some small bills and change from my dresser. My roommate sided with her, saying it wasn’t a big deal.
Our friendship soured, I got a new lock for my room that only I had a key to, and I set up a security camera on my desk. She never did do it again after being caught, but it made the rest of the time I lived there not particularly pleasant. I always felt slightly on edge, keeping an eye to make sure nothing had been moved or taken.
